For the uninitiated, vabbing means using your own vaginal secretions as perfume. Insert a finger into your vagina and then strategically dab it on your wrist or behind your ear to increase your attractiveness and attract a partner.
The idea behind this is that the pheromones released by your bodily fluid subliminally lure potential mates to you.
What do you make of it?
If you’re like most people who have responded to an influencer on TikTok who posted a video claiming it would help you get dates, your knee-jerk reaction is “Ewwww!”
Shortly after, I was a guest on Woman’s Hour with an evolutionary biologist and summed up the mood on social media after the interview as “disgusted.”
‘Yuk! Why would you do that?’ ‘Why do you want to smell like that!’
Even ignoring the obviously misogynist undertones, I was amazed at how negative the reaction was.
Is the vagina really that intimidating and repulsive?
I’ve been encouraging women to vape for decades and would still highly recommend it for a number of reasons.
Tracey Cox says “Vabben” gets you more attention and increases your attractiveness to attract a partner (stock image)
It’s nothing new
I wrote about vabbing in my very first book, Hot Sex: How To Do It, twenty-two years ago.
It wasn’t called vabbing back then and I’m not even sure if it was a known technique or sexual practice – I just thought it was something sexy.
We were all obsessed with pheromones at the time, and using vaginal secretions to attract a partner seemed logical to me. If you wanted to send someone a secret, erotic biological signal, why not (erm) go straight to the source.
Unfortunately, like the G-spot, pheromones didn’t quite turn out to be the sexual magic ingredient we were all hoping for.
And guess what?
Vabbing does NOT work because of the pheromones
Our body fluids contain pheromones, and pheromones in the animal kingdom can induce sexual arousal.
But the evidence is weak that they do the same for humans. (Apparently we are missing a “vomeronasal organ”: a sensory organ found in the palate of many animals.)
It is unlikely that humans can perceive pheromones enough to affect sexual attractiveness.
That “pheromone perfume” you bought that promised to drive people crazy around you? Yes, about as effective as tap water.
There is NO – repeat no evidence – that vabbing works because of pheromones to attract others.
But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t work.
Vabbing works on a psychological level
When I wrote about vabbing all those years ago, it appealed to me for reasons other than pheromones.
Never neglect the psychological impact of our actions.
Dipping a finger into your vagina and inserting the secretion behind your ear is an intentional, conscious act.
It says, ‘I want to meet someone and maybe I want to have sex with them.’
If you do this before you go out, you’ll walk out with a completely different attitude than someone who’s put on a bit of lipstick and traditional perfume and thought, “Maybe I’ll meet someone tonight.”
You have admitted to yourself that you are a sexual being, that you desire sex and are open to being seduced.
The psychological effect of it is strong and strong.
People interested in sex flirt more, touch more, make more eye contact and get more attention as a result.
Vabbing might be something only you know you’ve done, but by god it puts you in the right frame of mind to attract a partner!
It’s an aphrodisiac
The act of vabbing is proactive. It’s overtly sexual and it’s obvious.
The type of women who embrace vabbing is generally a woman with a healthy desire for sex. She’s not ashamed of having a strong libido — and doesn’t mind promoting it.
If you’re a woman who is less comfortable with sex and/or has a lower sex drive, vabbing can help boost both.
Because it’s something that could be viewed as outrageous, it can feel extraordinarily daring to do—and stepping out of your comfort zone is a sure-fire way to inspire desire.
Instead of seeing yourself as someone who is ambivalent about sex, you have transformed yourself into a sexual goddess.
Never underestimate the power of simple gestures.
Sex and relationship expert Tracey Cox, pictured, explains that the type of woman who embraces vabbing is generally one with a healthy desire for sex
Viva la vulva!
Far from being a “desperate” act to attract men, what I love most about vabbing is that it celebrates the vulva.
So many women are ashamed of their genitals. In the 30 or so years that I’ve been a sex educator, I’ve spent a lot of it reassuring women that their genitals look and smell okay.
By using your vaginal fluids as perfume, you’re proclaiming, “Hey, I not only smell OK, I smell GREAT!”
Instead of being ashamed, we hug our genitals. Doing it sends a strong feminist message.
Even if it’s not for you, you can’t help but be happy that the vulva is out and proud!
Think you might want to give it a try?
Here’s the answer to the first question everyone asks…
Can people tell if I do?
Do people recognize what they smell?
On a conscious level, I highly doubt that because the smell of a healthy vagina is slightly sweet but subtle.
(If the smell is particularly strong or repulsive, that’s your cue to make an appointment with your doctor. Vaginal infections, STDs, where we are in our menstrual cycle, pregnancy — all affect how we smell. Let it go check if it is unusual.)
On a subliminal level, some people can have a hunch that something is going on…without really knowing what.
When we get aroused, our body gives off a musky smell that arouses us. You can smell when someone turns you on: Sexual desire and smell have always been linked.
Vabbing eliminates the middleman and brings that scent to the fore—before you’ve even started having sex.
I honestly don’t think anyone will arrest you for vabbing; step back, look horrified and ask: “Do I smell what I think I smell?!”
But if they suspected and found out later, the kind of partner you’re trying to attract would probably find it more stimulating than off-putting.
Tracey has a new co-host for her weekly podcast SexTok. Tune in next Tuesday to listen to “SexTok With Tracey and Kelsey” everywhere you listen to podcasts. Send her a question that you would like answered on the show at sextokpod.com.
